No matter how big or small they are, having dreams in life helps give you a sense of purpose. Without them our lives may feel unfulfilled and lack direction. Have you ever dreamt about doing something that you wanted so much, that you became absolutely laser focussed on achieving it?  Think back to that time. What changed in you? Did you visualise your end goal and think about how it would look? When you felt like you were failing, did you give up or did you get back up? Did you listen to voices of negativity around you or your own internal voice that said you won’t do it, it’s not possible? Or instead, did you channel a more positive inner dialogue that said, “I can and I will.” repeatedly, even when it got really tough? Which voice shouted the loudest on your journey – which did you listen to? Whatever your answer to this final question, likely determines the outcome of your story.

While we cannot control our outside world we do have the ability to control our inner world. When we really want something, we raise our standard to get it. However, raising our standard alone is not enough. Having a vision is not enough. In order to get to where we need to be, we need to develop positive rituals to back it up.

“Willpower doesn’t last, but rituals can last a lifetime.”

~ Tony Robbins

Over 40 fashion blogger


We all have daily rituals that we follow that become part of our routine. Some are so ingrained in us that we don’t even consciously think about them. Maybe when you get up in the morning you go for a run, or maybe you have your morning coffee. At bedtime, you will have another set of rituals such as cleaning your teeth, taking off your makeup or reading in bed. However you start or end your day, are all rituals you’ve created. They provide structure to your everyday life, give you comfort and help you maintain order.

When you’re pursuing a dream, you’re going to need to create rituals that will help you get to where you need to be. These are likely to be new rituals. If you want to get fit, you’re going to have to condition yourself to work out as part of your daily or weekly routine. This might feel tough at first but if you make it one of your rituals, you are less likely to give it up than if you rely on willpower alone.

Learning new rituals can be tough on your brain at first and so it may fight against it, preferring to head back to the familiarity of old habits. Think of the coffee cup analogy. Imagine you went into your kitchen and moved all your coffee cups from one cupboard to another because it made more sense to have them in the new cupboard. There’s a good chance you would at times, still unconsciously head back to the original cupboard they were in, before remembering they had moved. From there you may be conscious about remembering that they had moved, until eventually, you open the right cupboard every time without conscious thought.

This is the same with a ritual because it is a learned behaviour. In order to create a ritual, you need to have consistency in your practices. By being consistent, eventually your brain accepts that this is what you need to do, to get to where you need to be.


Do you even have a dream? Put another way – what do you want for yourself? What do you expect for yourself? If you’re struggling for inspiration on what your dream is, write these questions down. Make the answers into your dream. Your dreams in life can be as big or as small as you want them to be. If you want to dream big about becoming rich, wildly successful in business or the best in your field then great. Maybe your dream is to lose weight or to become healthier, to spend more time with your family or to have better relationships. Maybe it’s just to feel better about yourself than you do right now.

‘Having a dream’ put simply, is deciding what you want in life and putting the appropriate steps in place to make it happen. The steps you take may vary depending on your end goal but there is also a formula you can use to ensure you have the best chance of getting there and realising your dream. Consistency, discipline, self belief, visualisation and knowledge are the five key ingredients you’ll need to help you achieve your dream.


I have begun to watch and listen to motivational speakers and entrepreneurs on YouTube and through audio books in order to help me train my own mindset for success. I do this because I have a vision of where I want to be in life. Even though I’m still figuring out how I’m going to get there, I believe that by learning from others, educating myself and opening my mind to all the possibilities, I have a much greater chance of making it happen. I believe I have the skill set and I have the visualisation but I need to incorporate the consistency and discipline in my practices to get me there.

I am currently listening to an audio book called She Means Business by a very inspirational woman called Carrie Green. Carrie set up the Female Entrepreneur Association – an online hub on a mission to inspire and empower women from around the world to turn their ideas into a reality and build wildly successful businesses. In the book she stresses the importance of showing up for your dreams everyday and visualising how they look. She suggests writing them down, having a book to write down all your ideas. She has a dream jar where she writes down her dreams on a small piece of paper and places them in the jar. Everyday, she picks one and focusses on it for 2 minutes to reinforce where she wants to be.

If, like me, you have a dream but don’t quite know the best path to take, then harnessing the knowledge and experience of others who can help you on your journey is a great starting point.

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you imagined.”

~ Henry David Thoreau


When you’re pursuing a dream, it’s inevitable that you’re going to make mistakes along the way. There is no straight line to success. It takes many twists and turns to get there and you may fall flat on your face more times than you would care to. However, failure is simply an opportunity to learn, to regroup and move forward with a little more wisdom than you had before. Getting up when you fall is key if you’re going to achieve your goal because otherwise you’ll never know just how close you could have been to making it happen. If you’re afraid of failure then it’s likely you’ll also be afraid to try things. As Albert Einstein once said “Anyone who has never made a mistake, has never tried anything new.”

Failure is just part of your journey to success and while it can feel uncomfortable and upsetting at the time, you can turn it to your advantage. Failure can actually make you more resilient, stronger and wiser. It teaches you to take a different path until eventually you find the path that leads to success. This is where the self belief comes in. You have to believe in your dream and your ability to make it happen. Sadly not every dream we have gets fulfilled but if matters beyond your control takes your dream from you, then find yourself a new dream, a new goal to focus on.

A young man called Henry Fraser who excelled at sport, in particular rugby, became paralysed from the shoulders down after a diving accident on holiday, aged only 17. He has since made a career out of painting by holding a paintbrush in his mouth. He is also a public speaker. This was not his dream as a teenager. However, when everything was taken from him he was given the choice of giving up on life or finding a new dream to give his life purpose.

“I didn’t have a set plan for my future but my accident has given me opportunities I could only dream of and I’ve got to visit places and meet people I would 100% never have met if it wasn’t for the accident.” ~ Henry Fraser

Life doesn’t have to be all or nothing because there is so much more out there and it’s amazing what we can achieve at any age if we believe we can.

“Failure is another stepping stone to greatness.”

~ Oprah Winfrey

All clothing featured in this post were gifted by Pure Collection.
Pure Collection’s mission is to produce“The world’s finest cashmere, sensibly priced and expertly crafted into beautiful, modern styles to make you feel special and look terrific.”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.